Parties Mother Never Gave

Parties Mother Never Gave coverParties Mother Never Gave

Submitter: I found this gem while weeding our cookbook collection. The entire book is not only outdated, but every recipe is a pun or a “fun” play on words. The pictures are all washed out yellow tones, making every meal look completely unappetizing. The book focuses more on ridiculous menus with a list of adjective filled names of dishes than actually detailing the recipes well enough to cook! And then there’s the almost seems like the author has a few family issues that are coming out in their writing.

Holly: I love cookbooks, and I can actually read them cover to cover like a novel and be thoroughly engrossed. My deal breaker for cookbooks is lack of (or bad) photos. The cover is colorful and fun, but is that the last photo in the book? I like the idea of menus, planning and timing tips, and shortcuts, but it needs pictures! And, yeah, odd title.

After the Ball

A Chowder Down Party

Herbed veal roast


  1. These are, indeed, parties my mother never gave, but Alma here seems to have more issues than I do. That’s a very passive-aggressive title.

    And who’s going to make the elaborate “After the Ball” spread to be served between 1 and 4 AM? You show up at my house at that hour, even on New Year’s, and you’re getting told to rummage in the kitchen for whatever you can find while I dig out a blanket and pillow to throw on the couch.

    My mom did make a New Year’s breakfast for me and my friends during our senior year of high school (we’d stayed up most of the night), but it was at 8-9, and we got Pillsbury cinnamon rolls, scrambled eggs, orange juice from concentrate, and were glad of it.

    1. My prom breakfast was also scrambled eggs and orange juice — but it was at about 4 AM, I think.

    1. I could figure out how to make Minted Cantaloupe myself and Coffee With Nutmeg (wtf), but not so much Brioche. Guess you’re supposed to stock up on brioche and the sweets store-bought. Although I don’t know where I’d have found brioche in a store around here in 1991; would Alma have let me compromise with some form of pan dulce?

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