Make Your Own Sex Toys
50 quick and easy do-it-yourself projects
It is Valentine’s Day, so on this special day of love, here is a book to warm your heart or any other body part that needs attention. Words just fail me on this title. It kind of reminds me of someone riffing off of the “signature” scene in American Pie. Is this a good library book? Does it fill an information need? Frankly, I have no idea what to make of this title. Maybe it is a just a giant joke. I do know that I will never quite look at household objects or fruits and veg in the same way EVER again. Since this site is PG (occasionally PG13), I am not posting everything, but you can get the idea from the images below.
Great! Now when I buy a cantelope I’ll be paranoid about the checker thinking “Hmm, wonder what he’s going to do with that”?
Short and curly hairs between their incisors. How about cucumber seeds?
OMG! Was this in a public library??? This is just mind-boggling. Wonder if it’s inter-library loanable? Hee, hee, hee!
This is as close to NSFW as you can get without actually being NSFW. I’ll have to show my supervisor.
Is it just me, or does the bear look traumatized?
Y’know… the term “melonf****r” is often used on the internet as an insult, but nobody expects you to actually DO it!
My kids’ stuffed toys?!?!?!?!?
That’s really creepy.
Whooo-tickle ME, Elmo!
Using children’s toys for dirty purposes isn’t a unique idea. That’s why a certain Harry Potter broomstick toy was taken off the market.
Presumably you don’t keep the sex toy stuffed animals where the kids can find them.
Good choice for the day.
I think I have a different edition of this book and most of it is pretty innocent. Features crafts like embroidering sexy outlines on pillowcases and making comfy handcuffs. Doubtful it’d fly in my conservative public library, but maybe in California?
From my copy:
“From kinky to cozy, here are 50 quick, easy, and budget-friendly toys to enhance your love life — all made from materials found at home, the hardware store, or the supermarket. Projects are organized into four main sections — For Him, For Her, For Couples, and Storage and Organizers. Practical information, step-by-step instructions, and fully illustrated, simple-to-follow diagrams ensure professional results even for the crafting novice. Quick reference sidebars for each project list the materials you will need, the level of difficulty, and the time required. Plus, take advantage of the improvisation ideas if you feel inspired or handy shortcuts if you’d rather just cut to the chase.”
Dejah February? Why would this be more appropriate for CA public libraries than your own? You have no idea what “conservatives” do in the privacy of their own homes. Just what to people think Californians are like, anyway?
(The book by the way…well, I won’t think of men buying melons the same anymore! And don’t even think of buying that used stuffed animal, no matter how cute!)
I’m going to have to put in a request for this title at my local library via interlibary loan. I’ll have to bring friends to see the look on the librarian’s face when I pick it up!
I WOULD have to be eating when I saw this!
“To avoid…overnight guests finding short and curly hairs between their incisors…wash the toothbrush thoroughly after use” Does this mean that there is a communal toothbrush? Or that you’d be using a guest’s toothbrush for..”IT”?
Somehow, I am having a hilarious mental image of someone with teddy ruxpin’s nose stuffed up their hoo-ha and a tape playing so it will move…………
@Lisa–Conservatives might DO all kinds of things, but they likely wouldn’t want anyone to know and therefore would be unlikely to check out the book.
The library in the town I grew up in was about half Christian fiction, so I imagine the area she’s talking about is similar.
Exactly WHAT part of the personal fan are you supposed to use and how? The mind boggles with the logistics…if you use it one way you’ll give your hand/s nasty cuts.
If you use it the other way…well, let’s not go there…
And if you’re supposed to use it turned off, what happens if you accidentally turn it on??
If you need to take the batteries out then why use it?
I’m sorry but this little section has raised more questions than my vanilla little brain can deal with. I need a cup of tea and something different to think about. Oooh, look at that USB stick…
The bear looks really pissed that you are even considering using him in this fashion! It’s like his is saying “Don’t even THINK about shoving my nose up your ho ha”!
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