A is for Alibi…

coverPolice Officers A To Z

One of my eagle eye circulation buddies sent this to me and thought it looked a bit dated. Yikes! I thought this was much older than 1986. I am also questioning the ABC format for material about police officers.  I would much rather see straight up information. I did, however, start coming up with better ABC terms for my own version of the book. (B is Body Bag, or maybe D is for Drug Overdose. P is for Pepper Spray or how about S is for Streetwalker?)


A is for Accident

C is for Crime

D is for dispatcher

J is for Jail


  1. Ooo… this is so easy to parody I’m thinking I’d better not.

    I wonder what things like Q were? San Quentin?

  2. Q is for Quaaludes, obviously.

    I was tempted once to submit a school book that was accidently returned to us. It was called “I Want To Be A Police Officer” and was about a little boy who, upon moving to a new neighborhood, got lost and picked up by the cops. He learned all about being a police officer while waiting for his parents, like how he needs a high school degree. It was from the 1950s and belonged to the library of a school that was attached to a church. I resisted temptation though and just shipped it off to be returned to the school it belongs to.

  3. “B” is for blue flu. Police officers feel they are getting the shaft moneywise, so they call in sick.

    “L” is for layoff. Police officers who suffered from the blue flu now need to find a new line of work.

    “U” is for unemployment. No need to report to an unemployment office anymore. It’s not 1986, so we can take care of things online.

  4. Of course!! I completely forgot about ‘ludes, probably because they went on a quest for oblivion… and found it.

  5. As a current criminal justice student, I found outdated books like this hilarious. Mary, I definitely like your version better. Here are some more ideas for it:

    -T is for Taser
    -M is for Miranda
    -X is for Xanax
    -V is for vice

  6. Why did they waste an easy “V” for Vandalism and call it “C” crime instead? D for Doughnuts!

  7. “The prisoner gets meals, a mattress, a blanket and a pillow …” and cable television, a workout room, conjugal visits, a library with a book budget, shivs, and candy (instead of cash).

  8. My dear mother used to joke that she would be better off in prison because she would have
    “3 hots and a cot and someone to do the wash”. I guess that what having six kids will do to
    you each 9 months to a year apart from the other.

  9. Not only does this book look MUCH older than 1986, but it sounds as
    if it was written for first-graders!

  10. Aside from the ridiculous alphabetic convention – dare I point out the obvious gender stereotype visible in A for Accident. Of course the little woman has rear ended some other driver – or worse, lost control of her vehicle and run into a pole. Happily, no one was hurt and the nice policeMAN is there to help her out.

  11. Also there’s a definitional error in the Jail entry. Prisoners technically are only inmates at State or Federal correctional facilities, jails are strictly local (county or municipal) facilities whose inmates are either awaiting trial or are serving sentances of one year or less.

    Also I’m guessing P should be for Prison Wine.

  12. I hate to admit that we have not 1 but 2 copies of this book on our shelves. One is currently checked out and the other went out last year. How did I miss this??? Yikes!

    P.S. Q is for Quarrel “These men were quarreling and hitting each other. The police officers have helped to calm them. The officers listen to their problems and write down what happened. They want the men to use words instead of fists to settle their fight.” I think I had the exact swing set they’re playing on in the O picture. O is for officer and it shows the officer still in uniform playing with his children in his back yard. Time to get on the publishers websites and look at more current offerings on the topic.

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