Parenting for the 90s cover

Parenting in the 1990s

Parenting for the 1990s
Osborne
1989

This book is all about combining those past theories of parenting into a new model. It seems as if there is always a “breakthrough” in how we parent. This is more an academic discussion. There is a grid outlining various parenting philosophies that I doubt non academics would find helpful. (I would be lying if I hadn’t thought about putting my kids in a Skinner box, just so everyone would be quiet.)

Parenting is just difficult no matter what. I read parenting books all through the 1990s when my kids were little. I am not sure that I had any particular moments of clarity or insight reading any of these books. The best advice is to keep trying and to keep reading, hoping one of these ideas or books will speak to your family.

Mary

how can I understand my kids? book cover

I don’t understand my kids

How can I understand my kids?
Bridging the generation gap
Wagemaker
1978

Short answer: you can’t.

I have decided that one of the most popular subsets of parenting books is the understanding/I want to kill my teenager books. Parenting books are kind of a Hail Mary for surviving the drama of teens. Every generation goes through this. The themes are similar, kids don’t listen to parents and all their abundant advice/demands/standards. Kids complain that parents are basically clueless. Both sides are correct. Can this be solved with some scripture and this book? I doubt it.

Although a Christian themed book,  it wasn’t overly judgmental and it did put much of the burden of communication on the parents. The examples are interesting, but again assume white, upwardly mobile families with lots of resources and choices. How can they be real problems if you have resources and choices?

1 minute scolding

Scolding Techniques

The One Minute Scolding
The Amazingly Effective New Approach to Child Discipline
Nelson
1984

In the world of nonfiction, many book titles fall under the category of “wishful thinking” or maybe “never going to happen”. Many books fall into this group: diet books, employee engagement, how to have an effective meeting, any get rich book, any books with the word “secret” in the title, cat training, cute maternity clothes, and last but not least, parenting. You will notice that many of these books are featured quite often on ALB.

expectant fathers

Time to be a Daddy

Expectant Fathers
Bittman and Zalk
1978

Even in the late 1970s, dads were not always allowed to be a part of the birth process. Consider this a sensitive man’s guide to sharing the pregnancy experience. Lots of feels for everyone. There is very little specific childcare or pregnancy advice. This is more about including the dads. Good choice for the late 1970s, but out of place in today’s culture.

Mary