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Pregnant and Alone

Pregnant and Alone
How you can help an unwed friend
VanDerMolen
1989

Those of us of a certain age remember when pregnancy out of wedlock was about shame and there was little in terms of options and support. This is the kind of book that means we are asking “for a friend”. Maybe the author/publishers feel that phrasing in this title might make it more accessible to teens.

Most of the suggestions are written from a Christian perspective and it is not surprising that there is an anti-abortion message included. In addition, the message is also tell your parents, don’t be surprised if the guy takes off, and recommends adoption. The author also acknowledges all the difficulties involved with unsupportive parents, lack of opportunities and the shame. Not bad in 1989 but outdated for resources and attitudes about unmarried mothers.

Mary

Pregnant and Fabulous!

Shame of Pregnancy

Say Yes to No!

 

 


8 Responses to Pregnant and Alone

  • I remember this one(used it as research for a story I was writing at the time). The final chapter encouraged the young women to re-commit themselves to abstinence until marriage.

  • Pages 18 and 19 are completely out of date now. Paternity tests and state laws regarding child support have changed the legal situation dramatically.

    • I am sure they had paternity tests in 1989 — can’t understand why they don’t mention them. Yes, I just looked it up. Is there some religious prohibition against them or something?

  • And to think that these days being pregnant is about the *only* reason anyone gets married. 🙂

    • Anyone straight, you mean. Our gay and lesbian neighbors have done more for the institution of marriage than anyone in the last decade

      • that’s only assuming they’re cis, though. there are plenty of queer trans couples who are able to have children.

  • Huh. I wonder if this book really was that great in 1989 and not already becoming out of date. I was born in ’92 out of wedlock, and it wasn’t that big of a deal.

    • I agree. My younger sister had her first child “pregnant and alone” in 1989 and I did as well in 1994. It wasn’t as big a deal to our generation as it was to our mom’s. The book should have been addressed to the parents of the unwed daughters and taught them to support them and deal with it.