Awful Library Books

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Teach Those Kids a Lesson!

teacher spanks johnny

Teacher Spanks Johnny
Rovetta
1968

Submitter: The book is called Teacher Spanks Johnny: A Handbook for Teachersby Catherine Humbargar Rovetta and Leon Rovetta (I’d love to meet their children now).  Being a teacher myself, I just HAD to have this book.  Empty threats are no more in my classroom!  Not after a quick reference to page 18 in the chapter titled Force Used on Pupil By Teacher where it states that “five blows with a ping-pong paddle is not unreasonable force“.  (Actually, I’ve never even dared to bring this book into my school for fear of it falling out of my bag or being discovered by the wrong person).  Though the book is not loudly “condoning” corporal punishment in school, it does offer some sort of a shortcut for anyone in the mood to offer a few, quick lashes to a deserving student or two.  It is meant to help the teacher understand the possible consequences of their aggressive (yet nurturing?)  actions by referencing some similar court cases.  So – the author is basically saying,do what you want to these little insubordinates, but first see what happened to the last guy that did it.  If he’s not in trouble for doing it, then swing away!!

I do enjoy this book.  Every modern parent should read it before enrolling their student in a public school so they can finally take a break from pointing their fingers in our faces, put the phone down and thank us for coming so far today.  For what we must put up with in the course of one school day, I think it’s best to say that patience is a virtue and your children are lucky that they only got 10 minutes taken away from their recess – could have been a meter stick, is all I’m sayin’.”
Holly: That pretty much says it all. Thanks, submitter!

Easy DOS It!

easy dos it

Easy DOS It!
Bauer
1985

There very well might be a reason why someone would want to learn DOS.   The information in this book is readily available without having to make space in the crowded computer section for this ancient book.  A small/medium sized public library’s computer section reveals the library’s relevancy, so effort should be made to keep it up to date.

I just love the cover, though.  It definitely looks like computer clip art from 1985!  Gotta love the $5 price tag.

Holly

What’s Wrong with My Snake?

snake

What’s Wrong with My Snake?
Rossi
1996

Come on, admit it.  The cover made you laugh.  Is your snake feeling a bit under the weather? Just glove up and tell it to say “ahhh.”

This is a very useful book, and if it were re-published today I would buy a copy for my public library.  That doesn’t make the cover any less funny.

Chapters on constipation and diarrhea, for example, would come in handy if you had a snake with those problems.  Believe me, you want the proper technique when administering an enema to your pet python.

And that’s where I’m going to stop.

Holly