Cheap Date Handbook

Cheap Date Handbook - Cover

Cheap Date Handbook
The Complete How-To Guide To Successful Inexpensive Dating

Men, your wishes are about to come true, because Mr. Brown has all the answers to your cheap dating needs. In this simple handbook, Bruce breaks it down for you. Why waste your money when all the ladies want is a little attention? In the first pic below, our man Bruce has got the inside secrets on sex. First stop, the library! While you are there, check out your friendly helpful reference librarian.

Sex isn’t all Brown discusses. There are real strategies to cheap dating. Free concerts are available and if you time it right, you won’t have to buy dinner! Choose snacks and coffee instead of expensive meals. Brown also suggests using your past dates as a referral service. This gal didn’t work out for you? Maybe she has a friend!

In picture 3 below, we have some rules for a “thank you” after a date and/or sex. A note is so romantic! Write down some poetry. (Don’t forget, the library is your best dating resource!) Best of all, next time you fly, buy some traveller’s insurance and make her the beneficiary. I guess you want your date to root for a plane crash so she can cash in. Super romantic.

Mr. Brown thoughtfully includes a chart to evaluate and keep track of your cheap dates. Gotta love a guy who is into cataloging and organizing information! Finally, the last picture (potentially NSFW) is an example of the pictures at the beginning of each chapter.  No book on dating would be any good without a few sexy pictures of the ladies.

Heading to the shower to get the sleaze off now…





Cheap Date Handbook - First Date Spending Limit

Cheap Date Handbook - Page 54

Cheap Date Hadbook - Cindy Mallette




  1. Interesting how these “ladies” forget to button their shirts (or wear bras!). I know I’d swoon over a guy who bought me a trophy at the five and dime, then had it engraved with “Sexiest Woman.” Man, these are killer pick up lines! Every dude needs a copy of this book. Forget!

    1. Haha
      I was thinking the same thing. Apparently in the early ’80’s the words “cheap” and “easy” were used interchangeably when it came to how to treat a lady to a good time without breaking the bank. Yeesh… this book makes me a little nauseous nonetheless.

    1. Lurker: I wondered that too. I am usually picking through old stuff but there seems to be lots of current titles out there.

  2. I laughed so hard at the trophy suggestion. The thought that she’ll love getting tacky engraved trophy is funny enough. Then the author ramps up the ridiculousness by saying “now she has a reputation to uphold.” Yes, that’s all it takes to get someone to change or maintain a certain behavior, a tacky trophy with the right saying printed on it. Frustrating teen? Just buy them a “Best Teen” trophy, and that’ll stop the delinquent behavior (hey, they have a reputation to uphold now). Annoying coworker or demanding boss? Yep, tacky trophy with “Nicest boss/coworker” will fix all your problems.

  3. It’s a shame the tone is sleazy. A book of ideas for inexpensive things to do when you’ve just started seeing someone is actually a good idea. It’s the execution that’s gross! (And, of course, now out of date.)

    1. I thought the same thing! The tone is definitely sleaze-o-riffic but the actual advice (free concerts! ice cream instead of a meal! picnic instead of a restaurant!) is pretty spot on for creative, low-cost dates.

  4. I love how the guy is scheming and plotting (make up a research project so you can talk to a librarian, be careful to avoid letting your multiple girlfriends see the cards you send each of them), yet honesty and frankness are on the list of what he values in a woman …

  5. “Additionally, back issues [of “Penthouse Forum”] left on your coffee table at home will certainly intrigue female visitors.”

    1. After seeing that, I’d be intrigued by the idea of how quickly and politely I could make my excuses and leave.

  6. It’s creepy that the authors of the two books this guy recommends, “The Sensual Woman” and “The Sensual Man”, are sister and brother. Eww.

  7. “Wow, he too me to a free concert, ice cream AND bought me the latest copy of Cosmopolitan! He’s a KEEPER!” said NObody EVER.

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