Awful Library Books

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Jackson Five

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On Stage, Jackson Five
Sothern
1976

Submitter: I found this relic in the teen section of my local library. There were 1976 bios on each of the 5 Jacksons within this book. As we know, a lot has since changed with the Jacksons, so it’s time for an updated bio.

Holly: Oh, but teens will be looking for this! (Nope.) The Jackson Five are still popular with the teen crowd! (Nope.) The book is still in good condition! (Nope.) I’ll agree to an updated bio – for the Adult section.

More Aging (and Deceased) Pop Stars:

What’s Love Got to Do With It?

Tie a Yellow Ribbon

Saturday Night Fever

King of Pop

America’s Band

Papa Don’t Preach

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Dollars from Dandelions

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Dollars From Dandelions: 101 Ways to Earn Money
Sattler
1979

Submitter: This book was found at my local public library. It was a great purchase back in 1979, but 36 years later it’s time to let that one go. Nowhere is there the mention of the internet and internet business. Plus the cost and money information is way off.

Holly: According to this book, Santa only made $3 per fifteen minute visit in 1979. He gets kicked, peed on, cried on, begged for gifts, his beard gets pulled, and he’s required to be jolly 100% of the time. That’s worth waaaaay more than $3 per 15 minute visit. There are some good ideas here, but it’s not clear to me if these are meant to be after school/summer jobs for teens or a way for adults to make some extra cash. The information on each job is way out of date, so even if you found one you thought might be promising (as the check-mark-maker for “window washer” did in the table of contents below), you’d be disappointed in the advice the book gave. Or you’d settle for waaaaay less than you deserve.

More Odd Jobs:

Ye Olde Career Guide

Butcher, Baker, Cabinetmaker

Jobs for Deviants

Pierogi Payout

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Data Diddling

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EDP: Controls and Auditing
Fourth Edition
Porter and Perry
1984

Submitter: I work at a public library which is currently undergoing a massive and much-needed weeding project, and found this when weeding the 600s. It is a textbook designed to teach accountants and auditors about electronic data processing. I’m not certain we should have owned this even when it was new, since it seems like it would be more at home in an academic library. Either way, the technology described in the book is so woefully out of date that it should have been weeded years ago! My favorite part is when the authors are discussing different ways that computer-related crimes can be committed, and one of the examples they give is punching extra holes in punched cards.

Holly: The picture on the cover should have tipped off weeders decades ago that this book was old! You guys, Mary was a accountant back in the 80s. I’m dying to know what she thinks of this.

Mary: In my life before library, I have done all kinds jobs. (Accountant, keypunch operator, switchboard operator, corn detassler, etc.) Never heard of data diddling. It sounds like something pornographic.

More From the Bleeding Edge:

Computers From Olden Times

Cutting Edge Internet Advice

Portraits in Silicon

An Ode to Code

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